got a good bit of advice from a friend of bill w. thanks dude i wont drink today. still taken it one day at a time. one hour at a time one min at a timeevery been sober for 13 years now and still every part of me screems for a drink this time of year. guess thats why AA was invented so no mater where you go there is someone there to tell dont do it its not worth it. I look around at my co workers and wonder who will get popped this season for dui. not me if i dont pick up. still gota a nasty case of the fuckits goin on.

went to confession last night with the family. now lying to God through a priest how low can i go.
wife has a cold so didnt hafta fher at least couldent sleep so got up and tossed off in the bathroom to a readers digest add for a bra or som such shit.

Still goin to the gf tonight caus i havent the nuts to tell her no. what the fuck am i so scared of that shell tell me to fuck off! that probably would be the best thing anyway.supost to go see som play or som shit tnite shes sicker than a dog anyway so prolly just sit and "hug" fuck what a waste of time. shes on the phone with me all the time now her semester has ended. just hang up and dont answer when she calls back i tell my self but i dont.

do i quit my marriage?
do i quit my girlfriend?
do i quit life?


BASTARD