More toe cracking

okay so this time it cracked and it hurt.
In other news my oldest son  is getting married in a month.
I'm in the wedding party.
A tux and
Rehearsal dinner is about the only I'm responsible for
I still miss her every day.

Big toe

my toe has started to crack little pops. 

Going to my house after work Edward is having cold feet 

Camping

I grew up camping in the summertime with my family it was fun fishing swimming riding bikes exploring it was great. I took my boys camping and off roading with my family in dads mhome not nearly as much fun as an adult. I don't think it's for me now though

Old friend

An old friend just got back off sick leave, intestinal problems he said. He's lost 30# and he looks like a thin old man now. The saying goes if you haven't got your health... What does this mean for me? Take care of yourself and it'll pay big dividends later on. And hope there is a later on.

First time as an adult

I was working along and thought take a break take care of that. I've been in situations before and said to myself Go ahead do it could not. But today like a toddler not wanting to stop playing i peed myself. Didn't think it would happen but it did fuck I'm now fucking old. Dammit

Words

I'm having a hard time putting my thoughts into words. I feel darkness coming down I fight it but it's random random and has different triggers and different paths to switch on the light and make it go. There is no one way no consistent way of doing it so most times I shove it down. It's not healthy but it's all I can do for now.

Vacation 6 April 2017

I could not would not do this trip without my Princess.
Flight to London train to south ealling
I can't even remember already
I've asked Princess to do it for us  
I'm not sure I'll ever ....

I'm back

I've decided to start up my blog again. Crazy thoughts tonight but I'm gonna document my vacation so maybe I can remember it.